Marching Onward in October

I know.... I haven't posted in a LONG time... and truth is... I was getting discouraged. No, I didn't stop working- I just wasn't seeing results for my work... which, frankly- doesn't sit well with me AT ALL! Remember me mentioning that I am an "instant gratification" type of person? well this process is NOT good for that type of mind frame if you catch my drift. Needless to say, I had to change my way of thinking, My way of eating and my activity levels. It took me a while to understand all of these concepts and put them into action. I changed the way I ate... didn't loose anything. started going to the gym.... maybe lost 2 pounds... then I put the two together and added an open mind and NOW I'm seeing change in my body! I am really excited too! I am down a solid 8 pounds from when I first started and plan to loose another 2 by next week!

It took a little while for my body to "jump start" it's self into this new routine. Bryan and I go to personal training 2 times a week, but that's not enough. So, we joined Anytime fitness and go there 2 or 3 times a week depending on our schedules. Usually- when we go there, I focus on cardio & try my best to get 20-30 minutes in. Then, I'll focus on one muscle group to work on that day. It's simple stuff- but it takes a lot to go and just get it done.

My out look was a bit negative until recently. Bryan has slimmed down a lot, like noticeably. and I can not help but get jealous because we literally do the same stuff day in and day out and he loses twice as much weight. (plus guys loose weight SO much easier & faster than girls... as if they didn't have it easy already haha). But he was getting a lot of praise and compliments from friends and family and I almost went fishing for some. I was discouraged. and I didn't feel a change in myself. Then, about 2 weeks ago- Bryan's cousin Becca came home from school & noticed that I was a bit slimmer. She said "Kristin! you look great! your face looks SO SKINNY!" I was in shock! that made me feel really good.... so I remembered that feeling and the positive attention I got. So I worked really hard and remembered the positivity I felt. on Saturday, I felt really good in my outfit and felt really confident! even Got to the gym 4 times last week and on Sunday, Bryan's mom commented on how both of us were slimming down! it made me feel amazing.. like AMAZING! Yesterday, when getting ready for the gym I didn't have to tug at my t-shirt to make it a little bit bigger and I was wearing skin tight leggings & there were no bulges! I came out and bryan goes "whoa! I said... "I know.. I look thinner don't I?" all he did was stare at my butt... haha. because of those feelings- I want to do even better. I walked into our training session last night, and got on the scale.... I weighed less there than I ever have! I was so excited! another positive thought to add to my thinking! YAY

Monday- i found myself wanting to go to the gym. Same with Tuesday. I'm feeling great.. and I know that is what is really important! I really want to continue on this path... I know bryan won't let me give up... and now I can finally say that I don't think I will let myself either! :)

(you guys better not let me stop either!)

That's all for now- I'll let you guys know if I reach my goal of loosing two more pounds by next week! (I'll be down 10 pounds if I do!!!!! YAY!)

It has been a few weeks since I have posted. I found myself obsessing a little bit and putting too much thought into this weight loss process. I wasn't making it fun for myself, I was making it work- so i took a step back and re-evaluated a few things. 

The first thing I realized was that I needed more help than I thought. I almost needed someone to break stuff down for me and then I would apply that to my lifestyle. Bryan and I have some excellent friends and family in the area and we decided to explore our resources. We considered joining a few gyms that our family attends, but we didn't feel like that was a good fit for both of us and our relationship. So we explored a little more and I called up a great friend whose husband has his own gym. The next night, we were at their house for dinner, eating with the kids and having a nutrition meeting! boy, i'll tell ya now, I needed that more than anything!

I am the type of person that HAS to work out to lose weight- I can't just diet and expect results. While talking with Jeff, he told me that I needed to have 6 small meals a day and work out 4 days a week to see significant weight loss. We talked about what I was eating and turns out- i wasn't eating nearly enough and not eating the things that would be used productively in my body! Cutting calories wasn't the answer, maintaining my metabolism was! I needed to eat 6 meals a day. each meal MUST have protein and fiber. when we talked about that and he broke that down for me, it was like a light bulb came on. Protein and fiber- I can do that! low carb, try not to have breads and eat as much fruit and veggies as I want... Easy right??? 

it  wasn't easy for me in the past because no one had explained it to me like that. We met for weight training on Tuesday and I worked my butt off! I ended up completing the work out and Bryan had to stop early! The next two days were rough because I couldn't walk correctly- My legs were in shock! I pressed on and swam laps on Thursday and Saturday, only getting 3 work outs in last week because I was in pain. 

This past Tuesday, I went in- stepped on the scale and was down 3 pounds! I couldn't believe it! so excited and ready for another hard core weight training work out! :) 

All in all, I have lost 5 total pounds since this weight loss venture. Not exactly where I want to be so far- but I'm glad I figured out what works for me. I am going to continue to work out with Jeff and take his nutrition advice! we do two days a week at his gym and then 2 days a week at anytime fitness or laps or at home work outs! 

it's an amazing feeling and I'm so happy I'm doing this!

Can't wait to share more with all of you! 

<3 

I know that I haven't posted in like 4 days, please don't think I relapsed! I have actually been really busy and have trying to get to bed at a decent time because I know consistent sleep and 7 or more hours of sleep helps promote weight loss. So anyway, enough with the excuses. Remember how I told you guys I was going to a friends house for dinner and that we were bringing chicken kabobs to stay with our diet? Well, it worked wonderfully! They had a veggie tray and yummy salads that went right with our diet! So sweet of them! So Friday I made Bryan and I some taco bowls before his softball games. I just seasoned ground turkey just like tacos but then had the meat in a bowl with a few added ingredients like lettuce, tomatoes and Greek yogurt instead of sour cream (seriously, it tastes the same but it has a higher protien content). Any who, I didn't work out on Friday because it was a sauna outside but I was on 5 days without considering cheating so I thought that it would be ok, besides I will a bit sore still from Thursday's workout. After dinner, Bryan and I headed to his softball game where I sat outside in the sauna and Bryan played softball in it.... For over two hours! No need for a work out- I lost enough sweat at the game! Saturday I was sure to be really active. I woke up and visited my old swim teAm that I used to coach last year, The broad bay barracudas! It was a cool morning until like 10:00 when the sun decided to come out. By the time I left I was sweating from everywhere!! Needless to say, I didn't wait too long to get to my parents pool. I stayed in the pool and played with my nieces for like two hours. Needless to say I was pooped and didn't workout for the second day in a row, even though I was really active. And I still hadn't cheated a bit, not one soda, no coffee, no dessert, no nothing. Later that night, bryan and I wend to his aunts house for dinner. This doesn't happen but twice or three times a year so we decided that it would be ok to "cheat" that night. We honestly didn't eat horribly, we just had stuff that we haven't eaten in a while. We had pita chips And edemme hummus (so good) and guacamole with chips. I was full from that! But then we had dinner which was slad and tuna for me and Bryan had steak, tuna and salad. By that time I was done eating.... But then there was dessert which I cant believe I fit in... Somewhere. We also drank alcohol that night too. First time in seven days, I only had two drinks and had a solid buzz, which is pathetic for me as most of you know! I woke up several times during the night and in the early morning with the worst stomach pains and I thought I was going to throw up. Luckily, I didn't but needless to say I was in no mood to eat. Sunday I had go babysit all day for the family I used to nanny for. I tried to drink a v8 but nothing was doing it for me. FinLly, around noon I found my appetite And ate some fruit. That was all I ate all day. I took the kids for ice-cream around 4 and I'll admit I had a Little for myself (bad kristin). The rest of the day I wasnt very good, but I didn't overindulgence myself like the day before. Either way, I never wanted to feel like the way I did on Saturday again. Monday I was good with the no carb high protien diet. And today I plan to stick to an apple and veggie juice in the morning then high fiber, protien and no carbs today. I also plan to work out today, even though the kids keep me active...non stop! Tonight is girls night and we are getting sushi. I plan to only eat two rolls and fill up on edemem and salad so I don't want to eat when we go to the movies. Wish me luck! By the way, someone told me the other day that no matter if I loose the weight or not (not that I'm planning on stopping) that I will still be a beautiful bride. That made me feel reLly great. I also wanted to mention that I went and tried on three dresses on my own the other day. The experience wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I'm glad I can blame the really big sizes on my boobs not my belly! Anyway... I'll post more details tomorrow!

Day Four:

Everyday I have been active and everyday I have stuck to a low carb high protein & fiber regimen. However, the number on the scale has not moved. This is where I get discouraged and impatient. I have a really hard time with not seeing results fast and expect instant gratification. You would think that I would have learned by now.. So here I am weighing myself everyday- which I know you're not really supposed to do and I am also expecting instant results which I'm aware don't exist. If I know that I shouldn't be doing or shouldn't be expecting these things- then why do I do them? I am excited, I truly am but I really just want to see numbers drop of weight "fall off" like some people said it would.

On the upside- I feel really good. Today was a little hard waking up with out coffee, but I'll be fine!  I feel like my tummy is "deflating" a little bit. I feel that it is visually flatter, most likely from the detox after the week at the OBX! but either way, I am thankful that there is some sort of visual progress to me!

I discovered something about my work out preferences yesterday that I didn't know before- I have always had a hard time with shoes- tennis shoes/running shoes. They always make my feet cramp and hurt while I'm working out so It makes me that less motivated to work out. So, Yesterday- Bryan and I went and walked on the Bay at Shore Drive. We were both barefoot and even though it was a workout for my calves, I could have gone for days because my feet felt great! I was happy to make that discovery because I really was having a hard time maintaining with foot cramps all the time. I wonder if anyone else has these issues with their feet??? does anyone's feet start going numb or cramp up while running/ walking or doing elliptical? Any Suggestions?

So yesterday I almost caved in because I was craving a salty and crunchy snack. you automatically think Chips right? well I didn't want to cheat so I had some edememe, then some nuts. neither helped nor satisfied me so Leah and I went to trader Joe's. They have these amazing plantain chips that taste just like baked lays. I bought some of those and she picked up some peanut butter filled pretzels (which I love! but I wasn't going to chance it) and I also got some ginger and seaweed to snack on if I crave again. The Plantain chips are not the best thing for you in the world, but it sure beats the calories and carbs from regular or baked potato chips.

Bryan and I had Ahi Tuna for dinner again last night and I had some more edememe. Tomorrow night, we are going to a friends house for dinner to grill out! I bought chicken kabobs to contribute. I was a little nervous at first, but she is aware that I'm trying to better my lifestyle so she was completely understanding when I was like... I'm sorry to be such a pain but we aren't really eating more than protein and veggies. She was totally supportive and wasn't hesitant for a minute which was really nice. and then I added we weren't drinking alcohol either... (ha-ha) just joking!

I'm going to go get a barefoot work out in before my work day starts today!
Thanks for all the love and support y'all! it really means a lot!

I realized that I forgot to mention two major things that factor in to this "make over" phase in my life. I am a dedicated coffee drinker. That was one thing that I would always do in the morning- and it was very rare for me to skip a day. I have this adorable tasimo brewbot that makes whatever kind of coffee I want- even iced lattes and foams the milk! it's terrible because I do really love my coffee maker! (ha-ha) but to show how serious I am about this process, I unplugged my little piece of heaven and put it in the pantry- out of sight, out of mind. I replaced my brew bot with my hot pink blender and electric juicer. I am not going to rely on substances to pep me up for the day, no matter how much I enjoy them- I need to make sure I can do it myself.

Secondly- A very important thing about this process- I am not doing this alone! In-fact, if i were doing this all by myself, I would have failed already, or caved in and cheated and it is only day 2. Remember how I mentioned that I was getting Married??? well Bryan is also doing this process with me! He has a goal to lose 100 pounds before our wedding. Bryan has done a few weight loss programs before. Mostly dealing with the no carb, high protein diets. In the past, these diets were very straining on our relationship because I was a vegetarian. all he would eat were meats and cheeses and all I wanted were carbs (another thing that lead me to SO much weight gain). I was a vegetarian for a little over two years and would rely on carbs and soy to fill me up. Needless to say, that wasn't the healthiest way to go about things. I would get upset that bryan wouldn't share anything with me or try a bite of something I made for me because it had carbs or sugar. It was like we were living together, but living separate lives- we would be away all day at work and then not share meals together because I would refuse to eat meat and he didn't want to be around the food that he couldn't have. Strain doesn't even begin to describe the tension that was in our relationship. After Bryan met his goal and began to eat the way he used to, the gained weight quickly. He has done this two different times in our relationship and each time, I should have been more supportive especially because he is going through this process with me now.

I began introducing poultry and Fish back into my diet about a year and a half ago. I was hoping that this would help me loose weight because I wasn't relying on carbs as much anymore. This didn't work out so well. I would eat the worst kind of chicken for me and in the unhealthiest way. Now, I promise to enjoy chicken and turkey the right way.... and without bread and Mayo!

So now that Bryan and I are eating Some similar things and he is being so supportive of me during this process and standing by my side it's strengthening our relationship instead of tearing it apart. I can't wait to continue this new lifestyle together and see how much progress we make before our wedding day! :)

Yesterday, or "Day one" was a little weird. I was starving in the morning even though I usually don't eat a lot for breakfast. I went about my daily routine as usual- but I didn't have to work so I tried to keep myself busy by doing house chores and of course laundry (it rules my life). I did my work out and was really feeling good. There were a few times throughout the day where I did have to nibble on something because I started to feel nausea. I would grab a 100 calorie nut pack or a 70 calorie cheese snack, and carrots, even some rotisserie chicken. Something that was high protein, low in sugar and low carb (even though nuts are high in carb but good for you).

I was wondering if this was the normal effects for everyone because I was warned by one of my good friends that I would feel tired. I was tired a few times through out the day, but because I didn't have work I was able to sit for a minute and snap out of it. I'm sure that once I do work on Wednesday that I'll be starving and tired trying to keep up with the kids!

Another thought I had was that I just came back from vacation. We spent a week down in Corolla with Bryan's family where we ate some of the worst things (for your body/ calorie intake) you could think of. But we were on vacation... the calories don't count- do they? yikes! I'm not sure about anything counting but what I do know is that I sure did eat and drink a lot down there causing me to be even more hungry yesterday because I indulged way too much. I do know that.

What I learned is that no matter what you put in your body, it will effect you. Eating a ton of food all the time, for me, will eventually catch up to me and when I try to limit what I eat, I will struggle with it because of what I put myself through before. I promise myself now that I will think about everything I put into my body and will remember how hard it was yesterday not to indulge in unhealthy habits just because I was hungry.

Either way, I didn't cave yesterday- I stuck with juicing- didn't reach for any processed foods or starches and ate a healthy dinner with salad, Ahi Tuna and green beans.

I stepped on the scale today- I know, I know, you're not supposed to check everyday... But I am SUPER impatient when it comes to myself... Anyway, Yesterday paid off and I have already lost 3 pounds!! That right there along with how I felt when I woke up this morning makes this experience worth my while!

Today I am having lunch with a friend so this will be a bit of a challenge because no matter where we go, I'm going to want that "full" feeling. And I know that if i cheat and step on the scale tomorrow and I don't see a change then I'll feel guilt- which is NOT what I want to deal with.



Count down: 319 Days till wedding
Pounds lost: 3

Solution for day 2:

Swimming and walking for excersize

Juicing for Breakfast
Nut pack if needed

Salad with high protein for lunch

High protein for dinner

No Carbs

So, I am starting this blog as a part of my new life journey. I would like to share my experiences, accomplishments, struggles and progress with who ever wants to know how I established a path to better myself.

I have to warn you that I will be extremely honest about myself, my thoughts and the way I feel about what I am going through.

I am getting married in 320 days. This is what has jump started my interest in weight loss. However, when I get married, I refuse to let that be the end of my journey. yes, I am losing weight to look my best on Bryan and I's wedding day, but I also am losing weight to start a new lifestyle- a healthy life so when we exchange vows- that's going to be the brand new start of both of our lives, together and healthy.

I would like to loose between 40-60 pounds before I get married. I know that this is going to be a challenge, especially because I have never done a process like this before. This is another reason why I started this blog. I need all the help and support as well as insight as anyone can provide to me. Kind words, motivation, even though love is welcome in hopes for me to reach my goal.

By the end of Summer, I hope to drop around 20 pounds and hopefully that will motivate me to try on wedding dresses. Right now, I don't even want to set foot in a bridal store because I am afraid that none of the dresses will fit me. This is not the first time I have had this fear, as this exact same scenario happened to me when I was in elementary school, when I dreaded shopping because nothing ever fit and I was never the same size as my naturally skinny friends. I would have to shop around for hours just to keep trying on clothes that never fit. I felt like I was set up to fail and would end up in tears in the fitting rooms in several stores. I would finally find something that would fit but I never found confidence. Sometimes, I even had to wear slimming undergarments, even when I was eight years old.

The only time that I thought I was a decent size was when I dropped a couple pant sizes in high school because of swim team training. I kept the weight off for a little while, but when I saw the number on the scale going up, I started throwing up to keep the number down. I know that this is completely unhealthy, but image was more important than health when I was a vain teenager. I lived my life in a bathing suit and never felt thin. This was the first time I started getting attention for my good looks and slender figure, which reinforced my bad habits.

I kept this eating disorder up for a while, only eating dinner so my parent's wouldn't catch on, and throwing up anything I did eat during the day while at swim practice or a work. I remember being excited that I could almost see my ribs... but I still thought I was overweight. Finally, my senior year, I came into my own. I was very involved with performing and was swim team captain. Due to the positive feed back from my teachers and peers for my natural talent, I lost the urge to purge and gained the self confidence I had been missing. When I graduated, I was at a healthy weight for my height and wasn't thinking about how to change myself.

Then College came and everyone left town. I stayed back and attended the local community college until I was ready to leave. I was really depressed and had to meet new people because all of my friends were away at different schools. I did go visit them from time to time but it wasn't the same as having them home. I switched jobs from life guarding to retail, I went to classes in the mornings, and that's when the weight started coming on. I gained the freshman 15 while I was at home. I had lost motivation and would just sit around waiting for something to change. When I left for ECU I gained a lot more weight from drinking and other bad eating habits. Needless to say, more weight came on as my lifestyle didn't and hasn't changed.

Now that everyone knows the history and what I have put my body through, please know that I want and need to turn it around. The right way this time.


Solution for day 1:

Juicing for breakfast and lunch
Snacks: veggies and turkey bacon

grilled Chicken and veggies for dinner

No carbs.

Workout: Walking 2 miles & strength training

Stay Tuned!